To all the ladies out there...please tell me it's not just me how feels like this? It can't be!?!? And if it is then I think I might need to go and see a doctor!
If you have read my blog for a while then you will know that I have always been very fortunate to have never suffered with depression or PND or anything like that. I am generally a happy person who just gets on. Recently though (past 2, maybe 3 weeks) thing's have been very very different and I am not 100% sure why.
It's honestly a little bit like I have been on a rollercoster. One minute I am happy and not worrying and have no issues at all and then the next I find myself either feeling really pissed off at nothing or worried about stupid thing's or even making up issues in my mind so that I have a reason to feel pissed off/sad/angry/anxious or what ever emotion I am feeling at that time! And...the weirdest part is that I know I am doing it! I can feel my mood changing and I know I am either starting to become not a nice person or that it is starting to lift and I'm going back to normal. It's horrible! Not just for me but also for the people around.
I don't tend to let it effect bubs as he always puts me in a good mood and makes me happy but I think the person that bears the brunt of it all is hubby. He is usually the one on the receiving end of these''mood swings'' and I feel so awful about it but I can't seem to find a way to stop it!!
I get pissed off at him for the smallest of things which then builds up and up into bigger things. I snap at him for no reason, even when the rational voice in my head is telling me that he hasn't done anything wrong and that I need to chill out a bit. It's so hard! What doesn't help matters though is that Hubby is unbelievably stubborn, very messy and likes to always be right, so when I have a moan off at him he doesn't just do what any normal, sane man would do when his wife is having a mood swing and just nod his head and back away slowly, he winds me up. He makes sarcy little comments or sighs and shakes his head so you can only imagine what my reaction is like as a hormonal, raging monster!! :)
It's not like we actually argue or fight as we don't, but I just feel that I spend all the time we have together either blissfully happy and just getting on with stuff or totally pissed off and under appreciated. There doesn't seem to be a happy medium and I think I have sussed out why.
I had the contraceptive injection done about 2 and a half months ago and it was the first time I had ever had it done. For the first couple of weeks I was mood swinging all over the place, then things calmed down and it was all good. Now, as I seem to be coming to the end of the cycle and need to have another injection by the end of next week if I want to continue using it, I can feel the mood swings are back and worse that ever!
The reason I think that it is this causing the moods is because its not only the massive mood swings that I have noticed but I have also had the worst oily skin recently, killer lower back ache and have been on a period for the last 2 weeks. It's been horrid!! The effects on the way I feel and look have been bad enough but it is the impact that it's having on Hubby that is hurting me the most. I hate that he works so hard all week long and then he comes home to me being such a moody cow. He must hate it too. I have told him how I feel under appreciate as I'm doing all the cleaning, laundry, bathtimes etc whilst he goes out (he went out once last weekend for the day on a stag doo! That was it!!) but it then dawns on me afterwards that maybe he doesn't want to be here because I'm being such a witch! He works so hard for me and bubba and I am so so appreciative of him but at the moment I know for a fact that I am not showing him that.
I'm going back to see my GP in the week to discuss this injection as I don't know what to do for the best. I thinking of either giving it another go for 3 months and seeing what happens or looking at other options. I know one thing though, that I can't continue to be such a mardy cow to Hubby as he is so good to me and he doesn't deserve the way I am with him sometimes. Sorry hubby (if you reading this). I know I am being a mardy cow but I don't know how to stop it :(
What are your thoughts on this? Have you got any tips or tricks when it comes to contraception and/or avoiding these mood swings??